Almost every confidence problem – whether it be manifested in dating, work, ministry, public-speaking or basic human interaction- is rooted in a fear of rejection. Rejection hurts and it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that, but the simple and hurtful reality can really only be solved by a simple and liberating realisation of our true identity now found in Christ.
No matter who you are, we have all become a victim to rejection at some point, whether you were rejected by an employer, a loved one, a university, friends or even a church. The moment we experience rejection, it takes a hold of our hearts because it gives us a feeling that we are inadequate or maybe even unwanted. That hurts the soul in so many ways because God designed us to be affirmed and accepted.
So many people today look for affirmation and acceptance in ways that may seem harmless but are really potentially very harmful. We walk into a relationship, for instance, with the expectation of receiving complete affirmation from the opposite sex only to be disappointed because no one can ever meet that big emptiness that you feel. As a result, we start hurting people whom we cherish only to feel more rejected.
Truth be told, there is a certain level of affirmation that can only come from Jesus Christ – He is the one who is always on your wavelength. There is a huge God-shaped hole in your heart that only Jesus can fill, and until He takes that place, we will always struggle with rejection.
If there’s one person who understood rejection most, it was Jesus Christ. Isaiah 53:3 foretells thousands of years ago the rejection that He would go through saying, “He was despised and rejected by men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not.”
Jesus knows what it’s like to feel rejected. He understands your hurt and your pain. He can relate to your suffering and your sorrow because He once felt that too, being rejected by man and even at one point being forsaken by His own Father because of our sins imputed upon Him. But more importantly, Jesus has the answer to your rejection, and it’s His love and affirmation most intensely expressed through His work on the cross.
Jesus knows your pain and He feels your rejection, but He also longs to fill you up and affirm you by accepting you no matter who you are, what you’ve done or what you will do. Jesus loves and accepts you just as you are and openly pays the price of your mistakes so that you never have to be separate from Him again.
By Patrick Mabilog
